ToyFarce News: Playmates Toys' Original TMNT Molds Looking Forward To Retirement After 38 Years Of Hard Work

After nearly four decades of faithfully producing countless reissues of the first '10 back' Leonardo, Raphael, Donatello, Michelangelo, Splinter, April, Shredder, Bebop, Rocksteady, and a Foot soldier, the original Playmates Toys TMNT molds are reportedly looking forward to a well-earned retirement when the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles license officially moves to Mattel later this year... ToyFarce investigated.

"It's been a hell of a run!" sighed the Leonardo mold while looking forward to relaxing on a beach chair, sipping a tiny cocktail through a bendy straw. "I've made figures for the original release, the Classic Collection, the retro reissues, the Walmart exclusives, anniversary editions, the four-packs, the two-packs... Honestly, I lost count sometime around the sixth re-release. Some of my cavities have cavities now..."

According to factory insiders, the veteran molds have become legendary among production workers, with some claiming they can produce a Michelangelo figure purely out of muscle memory. "You just pour in the plastic and they do the rest..." joked one employee. "Sometimes they start ejecting turtle parts before the machine is even switched on!"

Collectors were said to be happy for the molds to finally enjoy some well earned rest, although they still have one final job... "They told us 'One last, final, absolutely last reissue, we promise this time...' before announcing the Cowabunga Forever 2-packs." said the Raphael mold. Others fans have expressed concern that the molds might get bored during retirement and start producing random 1988 Donatellos in their garage just to stay busy.

At press time, the molds were reportedly shopping for Hawaiian shirts while politely declining one final request to produce "maybe just a few thousands more sets, for old time's sake!"

More news at 11:00... "We are ready to never see green plastic again!"
*ToyFarce News is parody news for laughs and not meant to be taken seriously!