ToyFarce News: Scrambling to Hide Upcoming $350+ Haslab Cobra Rattler Ground Attack Jet Charge from Credit Card? We've Got Your Back!

by ToyFarce
September 09, 2024
Rattler

With just a bit over 15 hours left before the G.I. Joe Classified Series HasLab Cobra Rattler Ground Attack Jet campaign concludes, G.I. Joe collectors everywhere are suddenly struck with a far greater challenge than deciding where to display it: How to hide the $350 charge on the credit card! ToyFarce investigated...

ToyFarce interviewed several brave souls who have become seasoned experts at concealing the true extent of their toy spending. Here are their top tricks for dodging that post-campaign invoice conversation with their partner:

1. "HONEY, IT'S AN INVESTMENT!"
A classic - claim that buying the HasLab Cobra Rattler Ground Attack Jet is like buying stocks, only cooler and with missiles! One collector explained, "I told my wife it’s an investment for the future! I can sell it for more than double the value!" When asked if he ever actually intends to sell any of his collection, he quickly changed the subject.


2. "IT WAS ON SALE!"
Several collectors are preparing to drop the all-time favorite excuse: "But it was on sale!" even though HasLab crowdfunding campaigns aren't exactly known for offering discounts. "My partner doesn’t know that..." added one smirking G.I. Joe fan. "They think everything has a sale at some point. I’m just hoping they don’t Google it…"


3. "IT'S FOR MY SON!"
One collector had a stroke of genius: "I told my spouse that it was a present for the kids, but they’re too young to open it so they'll have to wait until they’re 18!" That way, the HasLab Cobra Rattler Ground Attack Jet becomes a 'future gift', which also conveniently remains sealed for the next two decades. Also, remember, it was for his birthday!


4. "I MUST HAVE BUTT-DIALED IT OR SOMETHING..."
An bold move, but still effective. "It looks like I accidentally logged in, added it to my card, entered all my info and confirmed the order while my phone was in my pocket. Ooopsie!" How does this keep happening, right?

As the campaign clock winds down and G.I. Joe fans prepare for their next great battle, one thing is clear: the war isn’t over until that $350+ charge is hidden, and collectors are always thinking several steps ahead! Good luck, fellow collectors! Yo Joe!

More news at 11:00... and remember, it's better if they don't know how much you spent... *even* if knowing is half the battle.
*ToyFarce News is parody news for laughs and not meant to be taken seriously!



Comments...

Last 10 comments - ( Read All Posts )
ucsf - 2024-09-11 @ 8:19 pm

Nothing like the good old "it's for the decoration, the walls (aside from the other 400 collectibles) look pretty plain for my taste" convo, or just marry a blind person for your own sake.

jgpeak26 - 2024-09-09 @ 3:52 pm

Here's my answer: "I earned the money, I decide how to spend it." Pretty simple.

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