Black Friday: a day of joy for bargain hunters, and a day of doom for
one particular collector: Meet Gerald, a die-hard action figure collector who just realized that his meticulously curated collection has essentially halved in value, thanks to this year's
Black Friday sales... ToyFarce investigated.
Gerald, who spent the last year hunting down exclusives, pre-ordering figures months in advance, and occasionally paying secondary market prices that made his wallet cry, was horrified to see most of the items he owns listed at
50% off today.
"
I woke up early to check the sales, hoping to snag a few deals", he explained, still clutching his coffee with shaking hands. "
Instead, I found out that everything I bought this year, whether it's from NECA, McFarlane Toys, Star Wars, Marvel Legends, G.I.Joe Classified Series, Super7,... you name it, is just available today for half of what I paid. My entire collection is now worth less than half of what it used to!"
Among the hardest hits were his
prized exclusives: The
convention exclusive figures he camped out for in July?
Half price. The
collector's box set he begged his local store to hold for him?
Bundled with a free mug and still cheaper. Even the
Build-A-Figure pieces he painstakingly assembled are now available as a
single discounted figure.
"I
t's not just about the money, it's about the principle!" Gerald lamented. "
These were supposed to be treasures, not... Black Friday bargain bin fodder!"
His friends, however, are less sympathetic: "
This happens every year..." one fellow collector quipped. "
You just gotta wait for the sales, man. Pre-ordering is for suckers!". To make matters worse, Gerald's wife chimed in with a sarcastic "
So, does this mean we can finally get rid of all those boxes taking up all the space in the closet in the guest room? They're basically worthless now, right?"
When asked about his plans moving forward, Gerald declared, "
I'll never pre-order anything again. From now on, I'll wait for clearance...like a true collector!" However, sources close to Gerald report that he already has three pre-orders set for 2025, just in case.
As for his collection, Gerald plans to console himself by admiring the figures on his shelves, while trying to ignore the fact that they're now listed at "
Buy One, Get One Free" on every major retailer's website.
What are you planning to pick up this
Black Friday?
Let us know in the comments!
More news at 11:00...
"It's okay, it's just for one day..."
*ToyFarce News is parody news for laughs and not meant to be taken seriously!
