Hasbro had originally scheduled their
G.I. Joe Fanstream for today,
February 18th, but in a shocking turn of events,
Cobra forces, specifically the
Dreadnoks, managed to hijack the entire operation.
Hasbro had no choice but to delay the stream until
March 18th to recover their lost intel.
ToyFarce investigated...
After some deep undercover investigative journalism, we uncovered more details about exactly how the operation went:
- Hasbro employees received an anonymous transmission (with lots of hissing) demanding the delay: "You will NOT reveal anything until we deem it necessary!"
- Inside sources report that Zartan and his crew infiltrated Hasbro HQ in broad daylight, disguised as IT technicians.
- Security footage shows Buzzer, Ripper and Torch making off with a laptop labeled 'Top Secret Fanstream Info'.
- Hasbro employees discovered their desks and computers covered in graffiti, and their Powerpoints slides replaced with pictures of motorcycles, chainsaws, and crude doodles of Roadblock in a dress.
- Destro allegedly offered to "sell the files back" at a steep price, but Hasbro refused, citing "budget constraints" (likely due to rising plastic costs).
- Cobra Commander issued a follow-up threat: "If you proceed as planned, you will face the wrath of a thousand Serpents... or worse: INFLATED PRICES!"
- In a desperate attempt to still go through with the Fanstream, Hasbro reached out to Sgt. Slaughter for protection, but he was too busy signing autographs and yelling at recruits (or 'maggots') to drop and give him 20...
Now collectors are left wondering:
Will this delay lead to bigger surprises, or has Cobra completely taken over Hasbro’s schedule? Luckily,
G.I. Joe fans won't have to wait for too long to see what's coming next: With the
New York Toy Fair next weekend, we'll hopefully see some reveals very soon!
That is unless Cobra pulls off another heist before then...
More news at 11:00...
Yo Joe... and good luck, Hasbro!
*ToyFarce News is parody news for laughs and not meant to be taken seriously!
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