In the wake of recent tariff announcements and price hikes, the toy world is undergoing a
dramatic transformation:
action figures, collectibles, and even basic building sets are now officially considered luxury items. That’s right, your once-affordable plastic friends are now
one velvet display case away from being auctioned at
Sotheby’s!
ToyFarce investigated...
The era of the $19.99 action figure is over. Welcome to the age of "
Prestige Collecting". All the toy brands, including
Hasbro,
Mattel and others will soon start rebranding standard figures as "
Elite Class Artifacts", while retailers now offer
payment plans that stretch into 2030 (some already do...). Accessories not included, those are now "
Optional Prestige Expansions".
Influencers have responded accordingly: Toy reviewers now wear
white gloves and use
mahogany turntables for figure spins. No longer is it "
that nice plastic smell", it’s now "
a prestigious polymer bouquet". The experience of unboxing a figure will now be a
red-carpet event.
Toys have always been about
fun,
imagination, and a little bit of
magic. Now, they will also be about
credit scores. But fear not! While the prices may rise, so will our creativity in justifying them...
right? 😉
More news at 11:00...
because who doesn't want a second mortgage with their pre-orders?
*ToyFarce News is parody news for laughs and not meant to be taken seriously!
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